A Thigmophilic being

 I put small bookmarks in pages of books where I want to remember one line--one reference to another book, one word. Usually by the time I am finished reading and ready to return the book to the library, I do not have the patience to go back, take each slip of paper out, and reread the two pages it was marking--to try to elucidate what, exactly, I was trying to mark for myself.

This one I knew I would want to go back for: thigmotaxic--an animal who likes to walk along walls, touching something as it goes. Its cousin: thigmophilic--touch loving animal.

I pictured myself on my walk down the long corridor to my office in the hospital. If I arrive a few minutes early for work, per my preference, I go to kneel in the chapel for a few minutes. Then, I walk toward my office. I've noticed as I do so, I skirt the wall, almost keeping touch with it through my jacket. The corridor is dark--not yet fully illuminated for the day--and quiet: the hallways have yet to shepherd the bustling crowd. In this darker and quiet walk, on my way to start the day, I hug the wall. It is a perforated wall; I assume some kind of sound barrier. My jacket sleeve graces it.

I am someone who likes touching things. I do not always love to be touched. But I can remember myself younger, in a Dollar Tree, exploring things by picking up each, feeling their textures.

Thigmotaxic in Alexandra Horowitz's On Looking describes rat behavior. "They feel most comfortable keeping in contact with something as they travel." Mice, cockroaches, caterpillars share the quality. Perhaps I'm one more animal, drowsy and weary, starting my daily march, making my way along in the dark, desiring this posture of humility--kneeling--then quietly scraping along the wall, as some sort of electrical grounding before the bright lights and bustle of the workday begins.